Pooh (Hint: not Winnie)

There’s no way around it. Writing about any travels in India would not be complete with the mention of, yes, pooh. Dung, crap, scat, excrement, stool, manure. Call it what you may but it’s going to occupy some of your precious time if you’re travelling here. Why?

Cow dung. First of all cows are everywhere. They wander around wherever they please. Just the other day at lunch a cow tried to enter the restaurant where we were. So with free reign cows have the luxury of dropping dung everywhere. Well let me clarify that. Mostly it’s in the road where you’re walking and you’re going to step in it even if you’re careful. It’s just a matter of time. You’ll try really hard to be careful, even mindful about it, but at some point when there’s a motorcycle or car or bus or truck ready to plow into you, you’ll step aside briskly, and bam you’re in it.

Cow dung 2. For what it’s worth there’s a market in cow dung. I’m not kidding. It’s collected and made into patties the size of large dinner plates and put aside to dry in the hot sun. I’m told it’s used as a fuel for cooking. When you’re riding around you’ll see large collections of these dung discs piled high waiting to be sold or delivered or something.

Dog pooh. There’s a huge population of stray dogs here. They travel in packs mostly. It’s a little intimidating for the first 24 hours or so but once you realize they’re not attacking or biting anyone other than their fellow canine friends you begin to relax about it. Anyway back to the pooh. The dogs do their business wherever they please so you need to watch your step.

Your pooh. I know, I know, but we need to address it here. When you use the bathroom here the paper doesn’t go in the toilet, it goes in the trash can. Yes the same trash can you’d usually have in your bathroom that you’d throw your q-tips, tissues, etc. into. In India, and Mexico for that matter, the TP goes into that same can and not in the toilet. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. We are assuming you can go #2. Most likely you’ll be constipated for a while due to the change in diet or other unknown reasons. If you’re really unlucky you’ll be in the opposite camp where you’ll be spending more time near the head than you’d like. NOTE: please see a doctor if symptoms persist. 

Other pooh. The whole time you’re here you’re hoping that everyone you come in contact with and everyone working at every restaurant you visit has washed their hands recently. Like very recently.

Other, other pooh. There are also goats around. Wild goats. And they too drop their pooh wherever. Goat pooh seems almost like a novelty, maybe even a bit cute compared to the cow and dog pooh. Then there are the pigs. Wild pigs. We watch them eat the garbage and trash everyday. Well we’re not staring or gawking or anything it’s just that, well when’s the last time you saw dozens of wild pigs roaming free at the end of your street? We wondered where the pigs do there business. But that’s a mystery for another day.

Anyway enough with this public service announcement. I’m headed out to dinner at a place I’ve eaten at dozens of times. I’ll have my flashlight handy for the 15 minute walk. Yes it’s dark. And yes there will be pooh. But I’m prepared. Now I just hope everyone has washed their hands.